\u201cSo,\u201d he began, \u201cwhat is<\/em> the reason for this meeting?\u201d He\u2019d decided to ask right away so he\u2019d know whether to stay for breakfast or not. I could sense his uneasiness as the server appeared with an empty coffee cup in one hand and a freshly brewed pot of bold coffee in the other. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHe\u2019ll have coffee and we\u2019d like some menus,\u201d I said, segueing into the purpose for our meeting. \u201cIt\u2019s okay,\u201d I said, looking directly into his eyes. He seemed resigned to stay and hear me out. The server poured a fresh cup and set it in front of him. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cCream or sugar?\u201d he asked my friend. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHe takes it black,\u201d I said, answering the question before the pastor could utter a sound. <\/p>\n\n\n\n We sat, sipping our coffees for the next few seconds before I began. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Well, I\u2019ve been in your shoes, … I know the struggle with ministry and the last thing young ministers usually need is someone constantly letting them know how they could do or say things better, right?\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n \u201cLook, I know the feeling when someone calls you and wants a meeting. Trust me, I know.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI\u2019m still in the dark,\u201d he said, now a bit more relaxed. Just then, the menus arrived and within a minute, we\u2019d placed our orders. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWell, I\u2019ve been in your shoes,\u201d I said flatly. \u201cI know the struggle with ministry and the last thing young ministers usually need is someone constantly letting them know how they could do or say things better, right?\u201d He measured his response, still holding his cards close to his chest. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYeah, I guessed that was the reason for this meeting,\u201d he said, sipping his coffee. Setting the cup on the table, he asked straight out, \u201cWhat is<\/em> the reason for this meeting? Have I done something . . . or said something wrong?\u201d I could tell I needed to cut to the chase and set him at ease before his food arrived; otherwise, he\u2019d not be able to enjoy it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI only want you to know one thing<\/em> you don\u2019t know,\u201d I began. I could see the \u2018told-you-so\u2019 look forming in his skeptical eyes as I began my explanation. \u201cLike I said, these calls usually solicit opportunity for complaints or notification of an intention to worship elsewhere. That\u2019s not why I\u2019m here. I do<\/em> know you well enough to offer criticism about how you do things or how you spend your time, but that\u2019s not my purpose in meeting with you.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cOkay,\u201d he said, \u201cThen, if I might ask, why? I\u2019m not trying to be rude or insensitive, I\u2019m just curious.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHere\u2019s what I want you to know,\u201d I replied, looking into his searching eyes. \u201cI want you to know that I\u2019ve got your back<\/em>.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhat do you mean by that?\u201d he asked, not a bit less reserved than before. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI mean, I\u2019ve got your back<\/em>. I\u2019ve been praying for you\u2014not that God would change your methods or style, but that He\u2019d let you see people with less skeptical eyes. You\u2019ve been hurt by things said to you by people who are supposed to be mature Christians, right?\u201d I said, more of a statement than a question, because I knew the truth. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHow did you know that?\u201d he asked, his interest now piqued. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI just know,\u201d I said, careful not to reveal too much, too soon. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYou\u2019ll never get criticism from me. You don\u2019t need that. You need encouragement. You need to know there\u2019s someone out there who believes in you and knows that someday you\u2019ll be giving this same speech to a young minister facing what you\u2019ve been through.\u201d He sat silently as a telltale tear began to fill his eyelid. I knew he\u2019d react that way. I knew what he needed to hear. At that moment, he let me in.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cJust before our food arrives, let me say something else. You don\u2019t need to worry about winning people\u2019s approval. That\u2019s a dead-end road. You\u2019ll spend all your time trying to please people you can\u2019t please and miss the real reason God called you into His service. You can\u2019t touch people\u2019s lives by thinking you have to coddle them or make them comfortable. Just be who God created you to be. Trust me, I know what I\u2019m talking about. God has given you a unique set of gifts. Be true to your calling and don\u2019t compromise through overwork just to win the affections of a couple board members who could never themselves do what they expect from you. Learn to spend time with the Father and listen to what\u2019s in His heart. You\u2019ll find He expects less from you than those men on your board do.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n Visible relief descended upon his features as he sipped from his cup and laid it aside to make room for the plate of eggs, potatoes, and bacon that arrived. I could see him beginning to loosen up a bit and knew that, together, we\u2019d enjoy the rest of the morning. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cLook at us,\u201d he began. \u201cSame breakfast, same coffee. That\u2019s interesting.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cLike I told you, I already know you pretty well,\u201d I said to my younger self, sitting across the familiar table in a booth in the back of the dated diner. \u201cI know you pretty well.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n\n\n\n Jim Beaird<\/strong> is the author of three books on leadership and three novels. His leadership series includes <\/em>The Proximity Factor, <\/em>The Providence Factor, and <\/em> The Pursuit Factor. His novels include <\/em>The Reunion, <\/em>A Face in the Crowd, and <\/em> Calculated Loss (book one of a three-part series).<\/em> <\/p>\n\n\n\n Jim and his wife, Kris, are retired and live in the Tampa Bay area. They have three married sons and seven grandchildren. Prior to retirement, Jim served as the executive director of the Southeast Region of Open Bible Churches. He and Kris have served together in ministry for 49 years.<\/em> <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" By Jim Beaird The young minister agreed to meet with me for breakfast on Tuesday at 8:00 a.m. at the diner on Highway 301 near Salsburg. I had visited his church on occasion and felt he needed some encouragement. I arrived a bit early and ordered a cup of black coffee. At the appointed time, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":32,"featured_media":18528,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"gallery","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[331],"tags":[340,341],"class_list":["post-18524","post","type-post","status-publish","format-gallery","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-no-one-ever-told-me","tag-apr22","tag-no-one-ever-told-me","post_format-post-format-gallery"],"yoast_head":"\nAbout the Author<\/h2>\n\n\n\n\n\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/openbiblemessage.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Jim-Beaird-2018-1-761x1024.jpg\"){kind=spacer}
<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n