Spotlight
Living in Balance
by Jessica Sanford
I have been in an incredibly busy season for the past several months as I have stepped into a new role at my church. Navigating this life change has been an adjustment for sure. I wish I could say I have balanced the demands of this new season beautifully, but admittedly, that has not always been the case. Perhaps you can relate?
Our daughter grew up in the era of Iowa native Shawn Johnson. You guessed it; after seeing Shawn win gold on the balance beam at the Beijing Olympics in 2008, Sydnie suddenly wanted to be the next Shawn Johnson, as did a lot of other little girls her age! At only 3.9 inches in width, the balance beam is a force to be reckoned with. If a gymnast is going to successfully remain on the beam (while jumping, spinning, and flipping in the air, no less), she must keep her weight distributed evenly. The instant her weight shifts even slightly, there is a very strong probability she will fall. It is much the same for us. Maintaining a healthy balance in life spiritually, emotionally, and physically helps us stay upright.
“Living in balance” has become a popular buzz phrase in recent years, but what does it really mean? How do we live a balanced life, especially when so many things compete for our time and attention?
In John 10:10 (NKJV) Jesus said, “The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.”
The word abundant in the Greek is perisson, meaning “exceedingly, very highly, beyond measure, more, superfluous, a quantity so abundant as to be considerably more than what one would expect or anticipate.” 1 If Jesus offers us an abundant life – one beyond measure, why do we so often settle for something far less? We were not created to live in a continual state of burnout, stress, and strife, lacking any sort of balance in our lives. Yet if we are not careful, we can all too easily find ourselves living in that exact place.
The truth is, the demands and challenges we face are probably not going away. They may come packaged differently depending on our season, but they will likely still be there.
God has a better path forward. In order to live out His best for our lives, we will need some guardrails—some safety measures that will help us to walk in balance, wholeness, and abundance regardless of our circumstances. The truth is, the demands and challenges we face are probably not going away. They may come packaged differently depending on our season, but they will likely still be there. If we don’t have a plan in place for walking in abundance and balance, we most likely won’t be able to live there either. As a result of my current season, I have had to put in place some guardrails that ensure I am able to still make time for things that bring me joy, like meeting friends for coffee, planning my garden, or decorating.
What are some ways we can ensure we are maintaining a healthy balance in our lives?
- Examine our priorities. The abundant life Jesus offered His disciples could not be found in material possessions, personal achievements, or financial gain; rather, what Jesus offered could be found only in a personal relationship with Him. It’s only in the person of Jesus Christ that we discover our identity, purpose, and calling, and this relationship must be first in our lives! When we get our priorities out of order, we risk living outside the spiritual abundance God has for us.
As a mom to two young children, I was struggling to carve out time to meet with God each day. I would tell myself, “I will get to my devotions later,” but “later” with a toddler and an infant isn’t guaranteed. The result was a wife and mother who was not necessarily the best version of herself. One day the Lord checked my spirit, and (in the famous words of Dr. Phil) He asked me, “How has this been working out for you, Jess?” My answer was “Not well!” My priorities needed some fine tuning. Once God and I had our heart-to-heart, I made sure to start each day with Him instead of trying to fit Him in. This adjustment made all the difference!
Question: What adjustments might I need to make in order to ensure my relationship with Christ is my first priority?
- Examine our lifestyle choices. The contrast to the abundant life Jesus offers is an enemy who comes to kill, steal, and destroy, and he will use whatever means necessary. There is an old saying, “Everywhere you go, there you are again.” Some of our current lifestyle choices may not be serving us well spiritually, physically, or emotionally. If we do not address these choices, we will end up in the same place over and over again. In order to live in the balance and abundance Christ has for us, we may need to let go of some harmful behaviors and replace them with healthier ones. For some, this will mean putting into place not only new patterns of behavior but also new patterns of thinking. Much of the battle is won and lost in our minds. As we go after some of our choices, walking in accountability with a trusted friend, mentor, or coach can be very helpful. Some lifestyle choices are rooted in areas of woundedness that are bigger than us and will require working with a professional counselor. Something I have learned about myself over the years is that I tend to want to step in and fill a need when I see one. (I think this might be the result of being married to the pastor!) Sometimes this can be a good thing, but sometimes this can lead to overcommitting and overextending myself. Because I am aware of this tendency, I am better able to set healthy limits. (Well, mostly!)
Question: What current lifestyle choices might be keeping me from moving toward wholeness and balance? Are my current choices sustainable?
- Examine our next steps. Whatever it takes to go after wholeness, balance, and living in God’s best for our lives, let’s do it! It is never too late to course-correct and create some new and healthier patterns of behavior. If we don’t have them already, it will be important to put into place some guardrails that will sustain and protect us over the long haul. Let’s also be willing to give ourselves some grace as we walk this out.
Question: What steps might God be asking me to take in order to walk in the abundant life He has for me?
We can do this, friends! The abundant life that Jesus offers is not some far-off, elusive pipe dream. Living in balance is completely attainable (regardless of our situation or season) if we keep our weight distributed evenly—firmly anchored in Christ. Let’s not settle for anything less!
About the Author
Jessica Sanford, has served alongside her husband, Matt, in ministry at Fort Des Moines Church of the Open Bible in Des Moines, Iowa, for more than twenty years and is a licensed coach with Leader Breakthru, Inc. Jessica has a passion to make disciples and to help facilitate spiritual transformation in the lives of those not content with the status quo in their personal relationship with Jesus. Matt and Jessica have two adult children, Skyler and Sydnie.
On the fifth day of creation, our wonderful God showed himself in a brand new way. He began to create the living creatures that walk among us. This expression of His creation has shown itself throughout history; from Noah’s dove, to Balaam’s donkey, to Jonah’s whale and Daniel’s lions, God has continued to use animals in His grand plan and purpose.
We can still use these animals as a metaphor for God’s love and guidance. One notable example comes from Bob Sjogren’s book Cat and Dog Theology: “A dog says, ‘You pet me, you feed me, you shelter me, you love me, you must be God.’ A cat says, ‘You pet me, you feed me, you shelter me, you love me, I must be God.’”
As true as this may be, something wonderful happens when the molds break.
[God] certainly doesn’t want to drag us from one destination to the next. He would rather we follow Him willingly, eager to remain in His presence.
In our family, we recently experienced an interesting phenomenon when it came to our pets. To understand the story better, you need to understand our animals. Ralphie is our young, spirited Maltipoo. He has never met a stranger he didn’t love. He is sweet, loyal and in many ways the ideal companion.
Then we have our chihuahua, Sally. We found Sally roaming our neighborhood in 2014 with no tags and no microchip. She had obviously been mistreated, and when I took her to the vet, they found so many things wrong with her that I was advised, “Don’t be in a huge hurry to find her owner.”
We cleaned Sally up, and two weeks later she was legally ours. While she is affectionate to us and our kids, to this day, if I lift my hand to give her a pat on the head, she winces as if I am going to hit her (something I have never done and never intend to do).
Ralphie and Sally’s unique natures show themselves on our nightly walk around the neighborhood.
Ralphie tries his hardest to pull on the leash and run ahead. He so desperately wants to lead whoever is holding the leash that he nearly chokes himself on his collar. (We’ve had to switch to a harness.) He is unaware that he is only eight pounds, and his actions make little to no difference in the direction we are going.
Sally, however, must be practically dragged throughout the walk. She is timid and afraid to take a step that she isn’t sure is safe.
It’s quite a sight to have such different dogs reacting to the same thing.
Witnessing this phenomenon gave me pause, and I couldn’t help but think what a picture this is for the diverse ways we respond to the Holy Spirit’s leading in our lives.
So many people are like Ralphie. They try to tell God where they want to go without any regard to His guidance. They would rather choke themselves on their own will than listen to what He has to say. Others are like Sally and struggle to fully trust the Lord. For them to move, the Holy Spirit must practically drag them to the next place.
It sounds like a simple premise, but so many followers of God fall into these two opposite extremes. People miss their destinies when they act like Ralphie and Sally.
But there is another pet in our household whom I have not told you about. His name is Caesar, and he is an old, wise cat. We got Caesar the year we were married, and he lived up to his noble name every chance he got. Years ago, on our nightly walks with the dogs, Caesar began doing something amazing.
By his own free will, he would simply follow us on our walks. No need for a leash. No need for us to coax him. He just followed our gentle guidance every night for the mere purpose of being with us. Every now and then we would have to call his name, but he was always nearby.
I believe that in a world full of Ralphies and Sallys, God would rather we be like Caesar. The Lord doesn’t want us to tell Him where we are going rather than let Him lead, and He certainly doesn’t want to drag us from one destination to the next. He would rather we follow Him willingly, eager to remain in His presence.
In Matthew 8:18-22, two men express a desire to follow Jesus. The first is overly eager, not knowing what he is getting himself into. Jesus gives him a stern warning, explaining that he doesn’t know what he’s asking. The second man hesitates and says he needs to bury his father first. We never learn the fate of either man, but I hope they both abandoned their natural tendencies and learned to faithfully follow.
Whether you struggle with being too aggressive on your journey with God or whether you’re entirely too scared to take another step, I believe we can all grow in learning to be led
After sixteen years of being our cat, Caesar died peacefully this past March, but not before we had gotten a kitten named CJ. CJ is full of life and extremely playful. She was always so intrigued by our old friend Caesar that she started following him everywhere he went, even if it meant a walk around our neighborhood.
Caesar indirectly made a disciple with our young kitten, who now follows us on our walks every night. Despite how aggressive Ralphie wants to be or how timid Sally is, we now have CJ, just following along wherever we go.
Whether you struggle with being too aggressive on your journey with God or whether you’re entirely too scared to take another step, I believe we can all grow in learning to be led. If we will stay close to Jesus, we cannot help but fulfill His destiny for our lives.
About the Author
Bill Francavilla
Bill Francavilla is the lead pastor at Living Hope, an Open Bible church in Williamsburg, Virginia. Having lived in Virginia nearly his entire life, he attended Lynchburg College, where he studied history and theater. In 2017 Bill received his master’s degree in theological studies from Liberty University. He has been active in missions to Mexico, Dominican Republic, and Cuba. He and his wife, Jessica, have four children: Alex, Liam, Rita Grace, and Gino.
I am Shane Blackledge, and my wife Amber and I are the founding pastors of Cultivate Church in St. Louis, Missouri. My story is one of transformation and God’s grace, showing how He can use anyone to build His kingdom.
I was born in Colorado at the Air Force Academy Hospital. My father served in the Vietnam War, and while stationed in Taiwan, he met my mother and they got married. When I was six, my parents separated, and my mother moved back to Taiwan, leaving me devastated. As a kid, I faced racism and extreme poverty. I battled depression, anxiety, and thoughts of suicide. I started smoking and drinking at eight years old, joined a gang at age thirteen, and was using meth daily by the time I was fourteen.
At age seventeen, I was arrested and sentenced to thirty years in prison for selling drugs. I found myself in my jail cell wanting to end it all. On my night stand I found a Gideon Bible, and I opened it right to John 3:16. As I sat there reading, I realized I was a sinner, but that God created me and I had a purpose to live. I repented and asked Jesus to forgive me. I felt the Father’s love and the presence of the Holy Spirit in an indescribable way.
After my release, I struggled transitioning back into society (finding a job, paying rent, and finding a church that would accept me). I was discouraged and soon relapsed on meth. During the years of my addiction, I was sent to five prisons and was incarcerated for over six years. In 2006, after nearly dying from an overdose, I woke up from a coma and realized God had saved me from death. That day I fully surrendered to Christ, and that’s when my real transformation began.
In 2006, after nearly dying from an overdose, I woke up from a coma and realized God had saved me from death
God restored what addiction had taken from me. I have now been clean from meth for seventeen years. In 2013, I married Amber. We started attending Waverly Life Church, served as youth leaders, and eventually started a Celebrate Recovery program. In 2022, God called us to plant Cultivate Church in St. Louis, Missouri. We resigned from all ministries and jobs and sold our home. In April of 2023, we started house church gatherings which quickly grew in Christ and numbers. We launched our first Sunday gathering in October of 2023.
Today, we are a church without walls, modeled after the early church in Acts. We have regular church gatherings geared towards discipleship, street ministry, addiction recovery, Christian hip-hop events, prison ministry, and nursing home visits. We work with local treatment centers and recovery programs to support and mentor people. We have partnered with churches and ministries to organize monthly inner-city mission trips.
One way God has used my story is with my podcast: “Kingdom Minded,” which streams into 1000 prisons across the country on over one million inmate tablets. In partnership with the Edovo learning app, the podcast focuses on sharing testimonies and teaching Biblical principles.
Looking back, I am amazed at what God has done. In just a year our church has grown from a small group in our living room to a thriving community, passionate about sharing God’s love. Amber and I are excited about the future. We believe God is just getting started with Cultivate Church.
He can use anyone, even a former addict and convict like me, to build His kingdom.
My story and the story of Cultivate Church are really about God’s faithfulness. He can use anyone, even a former addict and convict like me, to build His kingdom. All the glory goes to Him.
To donate toward our prison ministry and homeless outreach, visit wearecultivatechurch.org or check out our Blessing Bags Gift Registry at HERE.
About the Author
Shane R. Blackledge
Shane R. Blackledge is the co-founder and senior pastor of Cultivate Church. He and his wife Amber started Cultivate Church in their home in 2023. Today, the church is known for spreading the Gospel and being the church without walls. Shane’s podcast, “Kingdom Minded,” is available in over 1000 prisons on inmate tablets on the Edovo Learning App. Through testimonies and Bible principles, the podcast aims to teach, inspire, and equip Christians to live their best life now. Shane is an author and speaker, and his books From Prison to Purpose and Overcoming Codependency are available on Amazon. Shane and Amber have four children and live in St. Louis, Missouri.
When my husband and I married in July of 2019, it was with a firm understanding of our shared life goals and dreams, and kids were a big part of our plans. In our minds we would have our biological children first, and then when we were ready, we would pursue adoption. But the Lord always has a better plan than ours, doesn’t He?
After we had been married for two years and still had not conceived, we discovered that I was having fertility issues. I saw multiple doctors and was prescribed several medications to help with conception. During this time, I remember telling my husband it felt like we were living in “limbo,” not getting anywhere closer to having a family. Because of our powerful desire to start a family soon, we decided to divert from our original plan and become foster parents.
“Had I conceived when I wanted to…we never would have met Noah and Leif, our precious sons.”
After an entire summer of preparation, our license went active, and we took a couple of short-term placements. These were our first experiences as parents and had us seriously questioning our parenting abilities! But in December of 2022 we got a call about a four-month-old boy named Noah. Noah was in the ICU with significant health concerns. We weren’t given any idea how long he would stay with us or what his life would look like, and we were scared to commit to taking on a placement that held so much uncertainty. After visiting sweet Noah in the hospital and spending considerable time talking and praying about it, we decided we wanted to take this baby and give him a loving, nurturing home — something he had not yet experienced in his short life.
Noah joined our family on December 16, 2022, and immediately, I became remarkably busy caring for him and taking him to all his appointments. We were so busy, in fact, that thinking of my own fertility was put on the back burner; it just wasn’t my priority anymore.
On January 18, 2023, after a routine follow-up for Noah at Blank Children’s Hospital, we got a call from a surgeon informing us that Noah’s brain was bleeding and we needed to rush him to the hospital for emergency brain surgery. The surgery was successful, and I stayed with Noah during his recovery in Iowa City, two hours from our hometown. We were finally discharged and returned home on January 22. During my time in the hospital with Noah, I did not have any of my fertility medications or supplements (but like I said, I wasn’t focusing on that so much anymore).
So many children have endured brokenness and trauma, and they need to be loved. If we as the church do not show them the Father’s love, who will?
Little did I know that the Lord had everything perfectly planned. On February 2, just eleven days after our hospital discharge, I found out I was pregnant. We were overjoyed!
But God wasn’t done surprising us. A few short weeks after discovering my pregnancy, we received word that Noah’s biological mother was pregnant as well, due to have a baby boy in a few months. We knew immediately that if this baby also needed to be placed in foster care, we wanted him to be with his brother, so we told our social worker we would care for him. Noah’s baby brother Leif was born in May, and just five months later, our son, Sven, was born in October. Overall, when we brought Sven home from the hospital, we had Noah (fifteen months), Leif (five months), and Sven (newborn).
In December of 2023, we were able to officially adopt Noah and Leif, ending their days of foster care and guaranteeing them a safe, loving family for a lifetime. It has been a crazy and chaotic year, but I would not trade it for the world. At the time of this writing, their ages are twenty months, ten months, and six months. Our days are filled with exploring new things and reaching new milestones, and our home is brimming with baby gear (think three car seats, three highchairs, a triple stroller…you get the picture).
I honestly believe God planned our entire story. I couldn’t see it at the time of infertility, but had I conceived when I wanted to, we never would have entered foster care, and we never would have met Noah and Leif, our precious sons. Going through this experience has given me so much assurance that God’s timing is always perfect.
If you are in the midst of infertility, I know it can be hard to hear “God has a plan!” But as someone who has seen His perfect plan come to fruition, I encourage you to go to God in prayer. Tell Him your desires, your frustrations, and your hurts, but also consider asking God what He wants from you in this season of waiting. Maybe He has called you to foster, adopt, or minister to the next generation through your church ministries.
Perhaps you haven’t experienced the struggle of infertility, but you do have a heart for the next generation. How might God use you to help disciple and love on kids around you? So many children have endured brokenness and trauma, and they need to be loved. If we as the church do not show them the Father’s love, who will?
About the Author
Natalie Larson
Natalie Larson has been a registered nurse at MercyOne in Des Moines, Iowa, for eleven years, working in both pediatrics and surgery. Her primary role now, however, is being mama to her three active sons. Free time has been hard to come by recently, but when Natalie finds a few moments of it, she enjoys baking, reading, and crocheting. Natalie and her husband, Alex, can be found at Journey Church in Urbandale, Iowa, on any given Sunday, where their boys are some of the most popular congregants.
