No One Ever Told Me
No One Ever Told Me: Serving is Success
By Gary Khan
I must admit, I just can’t keep up! Facebook, Insta, Tik Tok, Snapchat all remind me how much everyone else is succeeding and I am a total failure. How do people look so good all the time? How come their skin is always so smooth and I have three eyes!? And why are their marriages and kids doing so well when my kids can’t seem to figure out how to buy me dinner at least once? When I see how other pastors and leaders are expanding their ministries, I can’t help but compare myself and find myself lacking. Anyone else know what I mean?
Some time ago I was struggling with those feelings of inadequacy and failure to the point where I was stressed and depressed. I would get up in the middle of the night and not be able to go back to sleep because I had so much angst about this house of cards that I felt I lived in. On one of those mornings, around 2:00 a.m. I rolled out of bed and decided to go spend some time reading God’s Word. (Hmmm, not a bad idea for a pastor to try something like that, right?) I found myself reading the story in John about Jesus feeding the 5,000.
Sometime after this, Jesus crossed to the far shore of the Sea of Galilee (that is, the Sea of Tiberias), and a great crowd of people followed him because they saw the miraculous signs he had performed on the sick. Then Jesus went up on a mountainside and sat down with his disciples. The Jewish Passover Feast was near. When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, “Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?” He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do. Philip answered him, “Eight months’ wages would not buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!” Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up, “Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?” Jesus said, “Have the people sit down.” There was plenty of grass in that place, and the men sat down, about five thousand of them. Jesus then took the loaves, gave thanks, and distributed to those who were seated as much as they wanted. He did the same with the fish. When they had all had enough to eat, he said to his disciples, “Gather the pieces that are left over. Let nothing be wasted.” So they gathered them and filled twelve baskets with the pieces of the five barley loaves left over by those who had eaten (John 6:1–13, NIV).
After reading that passage, I did something I usually do. I asked myself the question, “Who am I in the story?”
Was I one of the people in the crowd – sitting down and waiting on Jesus to feed me? Was I Philip, who started thinking about how much it would cost to care for the people? Was I Andrew, who wanted to steal a kid’s lunch but didn’t because it was not going to be enough? Was I the boy who “offered” up his lunch?
I decided that I identified the most, in that moment, with the disciples who were waiting on Jesus’ instruction and ready to do what He wanted of them. Good answer (and spiritual too), right?
But the moment I came to that conclusion the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said, “Gary, you are such a liar! (How dare the Holy Spirit speak to me like that!) You may want to be a disciple, but you think that you are Jesus!”
“Whaaat!” I argued. “No way, God! I would never assume that role!”
“But Gary, that is exactly what you are doing. You are stressed and depressed right now because you believe that you are responsible for the miracle. You think it all depends on you to do what only I can do because you have believed the world’s measure of success.”
Boom! Mind blown. Holy Spirit, right again! I had believed that I am responsible for the success, for the miracle. I needed to be one of the disciples, to just walk up to Jesus with my hands open to receive from Him and then turn around and share it with others. When I had exhausted what was in my hands, I needed to simply go back to Him and receive more to pass out. No stress there! It’s a win-win situation!
Here are some of the takeaways I wrote in that moment that I wish someone would have told me years ago:
- Serving Jesus is success! Obedience to Him is the greatest success I can ever imagine!
- Serving Jesus always entails serving others. The greatest Insta moments should be pictures of me laying down my life in serving God’s love to others. There needs to be a serving filter. And chew on this for a moment: the nature of a servant is that it is not on us to provide or to “make it happen.” It is up to us to simply obey, to humbly come to God with outstretched hands so that He can fill them up, not for us to keep to ourselves but for us to give to others.
- When we serve God and others unselfishly, God takes care of everything we need or want. I am sure the disciples were hungry too, but they served others first and after they were finished, Jesus provided a basket filled with goodies for each one of them.
You may want to be a disciple, but you think that you are Jesus!
Don’t be conformed any longer to the pattern of today’s social media, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds. Serving is success. Learn it and walk in it. Serving Jesus and others will lead to a sense of significance that will leave you joyful and at peace. If only I had embraced this fact earlier!
About the Author
Gary Khan served as pastor of Desert Streams Church of the Open Bible in Santa Clarita, California, for 32 years. He currently serves as the Executive Director of Operations for Marketplace Chaplains in Southern California. He serves on Open Bible’s National Board of Directors and as district director for the Southern California/Arizona/Hawaii district. Gary is also author of the devotional Greater. His greatest achievement and joy is that of being husband to DeLaine for the last 32 years and father of three amazing kids (two biological and one “adopted”).
It’s easy to get excited about beginnings: the birth of something new, the start of a fresh place. But we often forget that both the beginning and end have a purpose. Finishing matters.
I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful.
2 Tim. 4:17 NLT
What a beautiful reminder that we are not running this race to win; we are running to finish. Friend, God has positioned you in this time and given you specific gifts and talents to serve Him. Your race is now and it’s important. You’ve been handed the baton of faith and entrusted to carry it forward as you run your part in God’s divine relay. Here are some reminders as you run your race:
Train to endure
Do you remember what it’s like to run when you haven’t run in a long time? When you’re so out of shape that you can’t even run one mile without stopping several times to catch your breath? I am reminded of the intense training marathon runners go through. They train day by day, putting one foot in front of the other. Eventually, they can run many miles without stopping. This is because they build endurance and gradually adapt, allowing their bodies to train for the long haul. They don’t just train their bodies for endurance, but they also fuel their bodies properly to run the race. They change how they eat so their muscles can heal and rebound between runs, and they also store enough energy so they can function properly.
Like that of a marathon runner, your race requires proper training, nutrition, and self-discipline. It’s not just about the output but also about the input. God’s Word strengthens you and sustains you through your journey, and prayer and intimacy are where you rest, fuel, and receive the supernatural power of healing to continue.
Throw it off
I remember many times during a walk or a run when I realized I had a tiny rock in my shoe. Sure, I tried to ignore it, but until I took off my shoe to get rid of that little rock, it was impossible to focus on anything else. If not dealt with, the rock could rub my foot raw, cause wounds, or even worse, cost me the race. We all have things we need to throw off or get rid of.
In the book of Hebrews we are challenged, “Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us” (Heb. 12:1 NIV).
Maybe you’re in a season of transition in your race and the terrain is looking a little different. Just remember, how you leave a season will impact how you enter the next. If you leave offended, you start defensive. If you finish weak, you start fragile. If you leave healthy, you start strong. You are still running the race; what you pick up in one season is often carried into the next. Travel lightly! You cannot go where you are going without leaving where you have been. Once you’ve thrown off what you should not be holding on to, you are free to grasp new batons. Consider the power of carrying these batons into new places rather than dragging along the heaviness of old priorities, hurts and resentments, or sins and scars.
Rest
You cannot go where you are going without leaving where you have been.
Rest is vitally important when running the race. Sometimes to finish well, you need to rest. While you rest, Jesus moves. I have experienced amazing seasons of rest when I have seen God work in miraculous ways. A season of rest is just a season of catching your breath! There are seasons when you need to run, and then there are seasons when you need to stop and breathe… and that is okay. Some experiences are going to bruise you or knock the wind out of you. When that happens, take a moment and catch your breath. Remember, it’s not about winning the race – finishing is what matters!
Rest, if done properly, allows you to examine the reasons for your tiredness and relinquish what is not yours to carry. The trials, challenges, disappointments, obstacles, and hurdles you face as you run will naturally impact you. It’s not easy to go the distance, is it? The battles can be fiercer and the terrain rockier than you anticipated. Maybe, as you read this, your lungs feel like they are going to burst, and your muscles are burning because you didn’t know this would be so hard. Yet here you are, determined and locking eyes with the One who has numbered your days. Train to endure, throw off all that burdens you, and rest when needed. Keep your eyes on Jesus and finish well!
About the Author
Sarah Holsapple
Sarah Holsapple serves on staff at her church in Cedar Rapids, IA, as the Creative & Spiritual Development Director. She serves alongside her husband of almost 20 years, Pastor Harris, who is the Lead Pastor at First Open Bible. Sarah has been teaching and preaching for several years. She’s passionate about discipleship and women’s ministry and served as the Regional Women’s Director for Open Bible Central Region. One of her favorite things in life is being a mom to her two incredible children, Hudson and Lynnley Jo.
The last several years for Sarah have been the hardest of her life. She truly knows the depths of heartbreak and what it feels like to wrestle through healing. She has seen God move in miraculous ways and has experienced great comfort in knowing that we serve a faithful God. Sarah feels great joy in sharing encouragement from the word of God, seeing lives changed and people set free!
Sometimes leaders come in unexpected packages.
Toward the beginning of 2023, I had three separate conversations with three different women in our church. Each of them brought up in one way or another that they desired to learn how to write a sermon.
Not exactly the emerging leaders I was looking for.
From a strategic perspective, I’ve always been encouraged to invest in younger leaders. Not that the older generation is unimportant, but it does makes sense that with limited time and resources, we should focus on raising up those emerging leaders who will be able to influence people for Jesus for decades to come. So, what was I supposed to do with these three women? Two have grandkids and all three are old enough to get a discount on their breakfast at IHOP.
There were younger people in the church I wanted to develop. There were other leaders to which I thought it would be smarter to devote my time. But after praying, I couldn’t shake it: God was clearly asking me to invest in these women.
Before long, I was meeting with the group in an upstairs classroom at the church, teaching them my approach to sermon development (an approach influenced by both Andy Stanley’s Communicating for a Change, and my dad, who is one of the best preachers I know).
When God leads me to people I wouldn’t normally gravitate to, invest anyway. When it’s surprising and seems to contradict my leadership strategy books, invest anyway.
They each completed the three-month-long class last fall, having written a sermon of their own. Each of their sermons reflected countless hours of prayer, Bible study, writing and re-writing and re-writing again. Now, whether they share at a mid-week service, a special event, or a Sunday morning, they each have a message burning in their hearts that they are ready to preach.
I am excited to see what comes next for them. But I’m also walking away with a new resolve: I want to invest where God is calling me to invest.
When God leads me to people I wouldn’t normally gravitate to, invest anyway. When it’s surprising and seems to contradict my leadership strategy books, invest anyway.
If you look at who Jesus called and invested in, His choices surely shocked a lot of people. When you look at who I was when He chose me, that was pretty shocking too. I’m so grateful Jesus didn’t cater to the opinions of others and chose me anyway. I’m also thankful for ministry leaders like my dad, my mentor Steve Moore, and my long-time pastor Gary Khan. When God prompted them, and even when my potential was hard to see, they invested anyway.
Levi Thompson
Levi Thompson serves as the lead pastor at Desert Streams Church in Canyon Country, CA. Following a life-changing encounter with God at 17, Levi became passionate about facilitating transformative experiences with God for others and inspiring them to pursue their God-given destinies. Levi enjoys sharing life’s adventures and the ministry journey with his wife, Katie, and their two children, Noah (13) and Mia (8).
By LeAnna McIntyre
I have always enjoyed the story of Esther from the Bible, an unexpected hero for her people. An orphan girl just living her life, Esther found herself appointed queen of a whole kingdom. She exposed an evil plot, and because of that her people were saved.
However, I did not relate much to this orphan girl in my younger years, and I don’t know how much I even tried. I am no queen. I simply was raised in a Christian home with parents who loved the Lord. I loved God and wanted to serve Him. I remember crying to my mom when I was young because we had heard a beautiful testimony of a woman whom God had rescued from drug addiction, and I didn’t know how my testimony could show God’s love that powerfully.
I tried to fly under the radar. I am a wife of twenty-eight years to a wonderful husband. For years I was a stay-at-home, homeschool mother to four boys. I volunteered at our church in youth ministry, worship, and kids’ ministries. I just loved people and loved God.
I attended Pacific Region’s Discover Ministry School simply because I wanted to serve better and know God in a deeper way. I had spent more of my life feeling insecure than confident. Pastoring was not something for which I was aiming. But when the opportunity came to lead our church, God gave me a passion for His Word and a love for the people in our community. I jumped in, afraid but wanting to do what God had for me. I am now surrounded by people who encourage me and support me, and God is doing great things at our church.
At first, many people quoted to me Mordecai’s words to Esther: “Who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14, NIV). And then someone told me that I had said “yes” when others said “no.”
The insecurity in my mind told me that somehow I became the pastor only because others said no, and without realizing it, I believed I was God’s “Plan “B,” a backup plan because “Plan A” didn’t work out. I didn’t know any other female lead pastors to look to, so I questioned every decision I made and yet tried to trust God to work out this backup plan toward His good.
Now He is showing me that I am His Plan A for the call He has on my life. It’s a crazy thought, but I am coming to know and walk in it. I have learned a few things happen when you understand that you are God’s Plan A.
First, you begin to look toward Him in a new way. If I am God’s plan A, that means He put me here. I am not an afterthought. Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that He knows the plans He has for us. His plans are not for our harm, but rather to give us a hope and a future.
Sometimes we read that verse and forget that the hope of that plan coming about comes from God as well. So, we must get close to Him, close enough to hear His heartbeat and recognize His voice. When things do not open up like we think they should, when they don’t come as fast as we would like, being close to Him keeps us from bitterness because we are not shaken by the things of this world. We are led by Him.
Second, our boxing gloves come off. When you understand you are God’s Plan A for the purposes He has for you, you do not have to fight for that position. God is the one who called you; people did not give you that call. If you are called by Him, He will open doors and close doors as He sees fit. I do not want to walk through any door that He did not open. We must be careful to guard our hearts and not let bitterness or frustration motivate us to kick doors down or throw a fit in the hallway as we wait on Him. Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Everything flows from what is in our hearts. What kind of ministry or purpose will you walk out if you get frustrated and start punching down doors? One that is grown from a place of bitterness will not speak Jesus to the nations or even our neighbors. God’s timing is perfect, so we need to follow that timing to truly walk out the purposes He has for us.
Esther trusted God in the process. She was in the palace; she was queen; but she was just herself. You do not see her fighting anyone or forwarding her agenda. When she was told of the plot to kill her people, she fasted and prayed and instructed others to do so as well. She could have tried to kick down the door of the throne room, but without God’s favor and timing in that moment, she would have died. She was careful to be led by God. She was obedient to His voice even in the timing.
What I wish I would have known earlier is that we are all a little like Esther. We are all being raised up for “such a time as this.” God could have put us anywhere in the timeline of the earth, and He chose now. We are God’s Plan A for this place in time. We get to walk in obedience, get close to Him, and watch Him work out the good purposes He has for us. I cannot wait to see what He has in store next!
About the Author
LeAnna McIntyre serves at The Bridge Open Bible Church in Eugene, Oregon, where she has been lead pastor for the past two and one-half years. She has been married to her husband, Scott, for twenty-eight years and is the mother of four boys. LeAnna is passionate about prayer and worship and loving people well.
To listen to LeAnna’s interview with President Randall Bach about her journey from fellow church member to lead pastor, go to Better Roads-LeAnna McIntyre
