Spotlight
You Showed Me How
By Tim Zakarian
In last month’s article “Show Me How,” we talked about how to help someone who is newly saved take their next steps of faith.
To review that article, click here Show Me How.
Helping a person take their next steps of faith is important. When a person decides to put their faith in Christ, we often say they have been “born again,” they have been given a new life (John 3:1-3). Most mothers would never think of abandoning a newborn baby, leaving him or her to fend for themselves. In similar fashion, a new Christ-follower needs to be nurtured and protected. Yes, it is exciting that someone accepted the Lord as their Savior and has chosen to be born again, but it is also important they learn what it means to have a relationship with Christ. It is important we disciple them.
In “Show Me How” we provided some ideas for discipleship. In this article we want to share real stories of four people who were discipled intentionally and let you decide for yourself if the time and emotional investment paid off. We talked with Brea Acosta, who pastors alongside her husband, Tim, at Pathway Church in Graham, Washington; Caleb Plummer, a youth pastor at The Intersection, an Open Bible church in Spokane Valley, Washington; Johnny Montgomery, a staff pastor at Waypoint Community Church in Springfield, Oregon; and Mike Allison, lead pastor of Discover Church in Lodi, California.
1. Tim: How did you first connect with the person who discipled you? In what ways did you interact?
Brea: I was discipled by my youth pastor and a few other adult leaders. They accepted me as I was and mentored me towards the Bible as a new believer. They encouraged me and cared for me. They would send me postcards in the mail and schedule visits with me.
Caleb: I first met my pastor when I was in sixth grade. My family had just moved to the Eugene/Springfield area and started looking for a new church to attend. My youth pastor always put in effort to interact with me and make sure that I felt seen.
Johnny: [I was discipled] by a youth pastor in the area. I attended his youth group several times. This was a start to our friendship and discipleship journey. We met when I was fifteen.
Mike: Pastor Andy Stanley, when referring to the discipleship process, suggests that we should invest deeply into a few people for a long time. He uses the expression, “Do for one what you wish you could do for everyone.” My youth pastor lived this out with me. From an early age, [when I was] a student in his youth ministry, he intentionally invested in my life. We did Bible studies, he gave me leadership opportunities, he encouraged me to serve and to use my gifts to bless others. When I did not have a clear path forward after Bible college, he invited me to an intensive internship opportunity and exposed me to the crucible of leadership in the church world.
2. Looking back, what were some of the things he/she did to help you grow in your walk with Christ?
Brea: During youth group I was taught and encouraged to look up and read [the] Scriptures. I also participated in small groups where we would study the Bible. The leaders over me would also pray for me.
Caleb: My pastor is a big part of where I am today. One of the things that he taught me was how important my character in Christ truly is. I grew up in the church and always saw such talented people on worship team, talented speakers, and talented leaders. But . . . he showed me how important it was to be a man of integrity, to own up to my imperfections and allow God to use me through them. He showed me that none of us is perfect, that sin and mistakes can only be taken care of when they are not hidden. He taught me a lot about ministry, but he taught me more about what it meant to be a godly man in church and outside of it.
Johnny: My youth pastor had boys’ Bible studies and individual talking times. [He] created a space for me to feel received as the only Black person in the group. I was treated as one of the students in the group. He made me feel welcome. This allowed me to grow in my walk with Christ.
Mike: My youth pastor encouraged me through intentional Bible study, offered counsel when needed, and gave me opportunities to serve and use my gifts to bless others. He modeled a Christian life and marriage that I had never seen before. He demonstrated wisdom and discipline in his personal life that inspired me to do the same. He also advocated for me to have opportunities to serve and lead in multiple ministry opportunities and walked alongside me to develop my leadership giftings.
3. Did you and your leader have regularly scheduled times to meet? Did your leader use a specific format in your meeting times? Where did you meet?
Brea: Once I started serving as a leader in youth group, I would meet with my youth pastor to check in on how I’m doing individually as well as a leader. We would meet at church. I’m sure he had a specific format and used resources that he was aware of.
Caleb: My pastor and I did not start meeting regularly until I was in college. When I graduated high school, he approached me about an internship opportunity. In some ways, it felt like a long time coming, but I clearly remember being honored that he would make the time to meet with me and talk about ministry in the middle of a Subway. From that point on, we met about once a month. It was my responsibility as the intern to schedule time, but looking back I wish I would have spent more time meeting with him. I know that he would have always made the time for me, and there are not many people in life that would do that. Our meetings were some of the highlights of my internship, whether we were meeting for lunch or just in his office.
Johnny: As we started, it was in a group setting. As we got to know each other better, we had more individual times of discipleship. We met weekly [for] lunch and individual meetings and as needed. We met in his office typically.
Mike: When I was a student in youth ministry, my youth pastor would meet with me twice a month in a home or at a park, at times with other leaders as well. We generally had a time of Bible study as well as playing a lot of basketball and video games. He always made time to help me address challenges and encouraged me to be investing in people and not only projects.
When I was a student, he certainly made use of strategic discipleship Bible studies on the market at that time. Later in life our format often included reviewing our schedules, taking time to celebrate areas of strength, and encouraging each other in areas where we felt we needed growth. We met at strategic points to pray, do long term planning, and set regular goals.
4. If your pastor/leader was of the opposite sex, what steps did he/she take to keep proper boundaries in place?
Brea: When I would meet with my youth pastor at church, we met with the office door open and only when someone else (i.e., church secretary, other students, or lead pastor) was present and in the building. He was very cautious about this.
Caleb: My pastor is a male; I am a male. But there was so much that I learned about how to handle being a male pastor pastoring a female. He regularly taught me the importance of connecting a female in need of pastoring with a female that could help/mentor/talk with said female. Inevitably, as a pastor, we get called to meet with females throughout the week. Watching my pastor, I learned how it was important to have accountability. Today, if I meet with a female student, I do not meet with her alone. If we meet in my office, there is always someone else in the office and my door is never shut. Obviously, this sometimes is challenging, but my pastor taught me the importance of this practice and how it protects me and the ministry I serve in.
5. Now that you too are a leader in a church, does this person still maintain contact with you? If so, what is that relationship like?
Brea: We see each other at conferences or special events, but for the most part we do not communicate on a regular basis. When we do see each other, it’s always pleasant.
Caleb: My former pastor is like a second dad to me. I hesitate to say that because it sounds super cheesy, but I mean it. Throughout highs and lows of ministry I know that if I called him, he would take my call. We talk on the phone about once a month, and we regularly text about the Dodgers and the Lakers. The way that he balanced being a pastor to me, at times as my boss, but most importantly my friend, was truly appreciated, and I aspire to be like him in that way.
Johnny: As a leader, I have stayed In contact with my former youth pastor. We talk from time to time.
Mike: My former youth pastor remains a critical voice in my life although our relationship has evolved to more of a peer relationship. After planting a church together and then my subsequent launching into this new season of ministry, his insight, wisdom, and willingness to challenge me to continued growth is an essential part of my personal growth.
6. What were some things your leader could have done differently?
Brea: I had great leaders when I was a student and young adult. I am thankful for each of them who believed in me and gave time mentoring me. Although I felt that I was seen as a great role model for younger students and was reliable, I was never asked to serve on the leadership team for youth group. As a student who jumped into youth ministry with both feet, I always felt that I wasn’t good enough. I always wondered what more I needed to do in order to be a leader. Knowing how dedicated I was to youth group, church, and God, I think leaders should have asked me to serve on the team. I know that it has affected me as an adult leader. I sometimes feel that with all that I do for my church (past or present) I may not be doing enough, that I may not be good enough.
Caleb: I remember there were times I was adamant that my former pastor could have done this or that differently. The thing that I appreciated about him the most is that I could push him on things and dialogue with him. At the end of the day, he was not afraid to admit he was wrong or that he had made a mistake. Of course, there are things in ministry that can be done a million different ways. He knew he had a certain way and relied on others to fill in some gaps.
Johnny: I believe that my youth pastor’s model for discipling youth and others works well. He had very good boundaries in place.
7. Are you now actively engaged in discipling someone else?
Brea: Yes. I serve in youth ministry as well as leading women’s ministry and life groups at my church. I enjoy mentoring students and women, teaching them about Jesus, and encouraging them to love themselves and to find their identity in Christ.
Caleb: As a youth pastor, there are a couple of students who I have truly been pouring into as a mentor, leader, and hopefully a trusted adult. My goal with students is always to help them grow in their walk with God, grow in their ministry, navigate their lives outside of church, and discover who God has called them to be.
Johnny: Yes, I am actively discipling others both in the community and in our church.
Mike: Yes, currently I have multiple discipleship-focused relationships. I am modeling much of what I learned from my former youth pastor, investing deeply into a smaller group over a longer period of time while coaching multiple other leaders as well. It is my goal to continue to raise up disciples and model what was so impactful in my life for others.
Discipling another person requires sacrifice. It requires an investment of time and is not often accomplished during a 9-to-5 workday. Yet, in a time when people are supposedly more connected than ever through social media, “Just one in three 18-35-year-old respondents tells Barna they often feel deeply cared for by those around them (33%) or that someone believes in them (32%).”1 These statistics reflect real souls, people who may work with you during the day, sit near you in church, or greet you from across the driveway when you get home from work. Whether you are a youth pastor, a coach, or simply someone who cares about others, you have the opportunity to invest in another person’s life and to teach them to do the same for someone else.
As you can see from these four individuals below, your impact can be exponential in influence. Look what happened through Jesus’ disciples!
1https://www.barna.com/research/global-connection-isolation
Brea Owen, a California native, has been serving in ministry for nearly thirty years. She and her husband, Tim, served as youth pastors at San Jose Open Bible Church for almost ten years. They then served as youth pastors and associate pastors for thirteen years at Life Church in Concord, California. They now serve as lead pastors of Pathway Church, an Open Bible church in Spanaway, Washington. Tim and Brea have been married for twenty-four years and have three boys: Isaac (20), Jeriah (18), and Grayson (11). Aside from being wife, mom, employee, student, and leader, Brea enjoys spending time with her family, taking walks with her sidekick, Koda, and cooking. Brea is finishing Tier 2 of Discover Ministry School and plans to become licensed with Open Bible.
Caleb Plummer is a youth pastor at The Intersection Open Bible Church in Spokane Valley, Washington. Born and raised in Springfield, Oregon, Caleb always was involved in church in one way or another. He started attending Waypoint Community Church in 2011 and found himself with a calling to youth ministry. He attended college at Bushnell University (previously known as Northwest Christian University) and graduated in December of 2020 with a degree in both Christian Ministry and Mathematics. In his free time, he is either at the movies, at the gym, or spending time with his friends and family.
Johnny Montgomery has been married to his lovely wife, Melody, for twenty years. The couple has three kids: Hannah, Eliyah, and Calvin. Licensed with Open Bible Churches, he has been in ministry for more than twenty years, mostly working in youth ministry. He currently works for South Lane Mental Health and ministers part time as the Connections Pastor at Waypoint Community Church in Springfield, Oregon.
Mike Allison has been an Open Bible minister since 2000. He and his wife, Kristine, along with their three children, planted Discover Church in Lodi, California, in 2021. Along with serving for fifteen years in youth ministry, Mike co-founded Waypoint Community Church in Oregon, then transitioned to lead pastor at Celebration Church in Washington, before answering the call of God to move to Lodi and plant Discover Church. Mike has served as the Pacific Region Youth Director, Pacific Region Emerging Leaders Coordinator and Camp Director, and currently is an at-large regional board member. Mike completed his master’s degree in ministry leadership at Wheaton College in 2023. Mike has a passion for lifelong learning and investing in the next generation of leaders as well as helping people far from Jesus respond to His invitation to “follow me.”
About the Author
Tim Zakarian is the associate director for the Pacific Region of Open Bible Churches. He lives in Springfield, Oregon, with his wife, Tina, to whom he has been married 36 years. The Zakarians have two adult, married children who are serving in ministry. Michael and his wife, Cheyenne, are the youth pastors at Summit Christian Church of the Open Bible in Los Angeles. Christine McAndrew and her husband, Aaron, are the youth pastors at Waypoint Community, an Open Bible church in Springfield, Oregon. Tim has had many roles in ministry, including youth pastor, regional youth director, associate pastor, executive pastor, church planter, and lead pastor. No matter his role, Tim’s passion for the ministry has always been to mentor and develop leaders.
By every human measure, my story should have ended differently. The wounds of my childhood, the choices I made, and the life I built all pointed me away from God, not toward Him. Yet here I am—a follower of Jesus Christ, an author, teacher, and witness to the transforming power of God’s grace.
When I look back on my life, the words of the hymn Amazing Grace come to mind: “I once was lost, but now am found; was blind, but now I see.”
I know what it means to be lost.
My childhood was marked by deep brokenness. My father’s alcoholism cast a long shadow over our family, and I grew up yearning for his love and acceptance. My parents divorced when I was six. I hoped the turmoil would end, but new struggles emerged, including verbal and physical abuse within our home. I also experienced sexual and emotional abuse at the hands of older boys, girls, and adults in my community. Those wounds followed me into adulthood, shaping my view of myself, relationships, and identity in ways I would not fully understand until Christ began healing them.
As I grew older, I searched for acceptance and fulfillment in places that could never truly satisfy. I married early and had a daughter. I earned an advanced degree and took on increasingly responsible work. Eventually, I entered a same-sex relationship that lasted three decades.
The Lord was not exposing my sin to destroy me.
He was revealing it so He could save me.
Outwardly, life appeared successful. I enjoyed a corporate career in New York, entrepreneurial ventures, financial success, and early retirement on the North Carolina coast. But beneath the surface, something was missing. I had achieved many of the things people spend their lives pursuing, yet I lacked peace. God, however, had not given up on me.
In His providence, God began rearranging my life. A deep longing to be closer to my daughter and granddaughter led me to leave retirement on the coast and relocate to Ohio in 2020. At the time, the move seemed irrational to many people. Looking back, I can see the hand of God directing every step. Then came the moment that changed everything.
One afternoon in early 2021, I was sitting alone when I came across a brief teaching based on Matthew 7:21-23. Jesus’ words struck me with a force I had never experienced before: “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven.” And then the words that shook my soul: “I never knew you; depart from Me.”
For the next 24 hours, those words would not leave me. I found myself asking questions I had spent years avoiding. Was I truly following Christ? Had I created a version of Jesus that accommodated my desires rather than submitting to the Jesus revealed in Scripture?
Desperate for answers, I opened my Bible. I expected to find acceptance and affirmation that I had fabricated in my mind for decades. Instead, I encountered the holy, righteous Christ of Scripture. As I read through the Gospel of Matthew, God’s Word exposed my heart. Hebrews describes the Word of God as “living and powerful,” and that is exactly how I experienced it. The Bible was no longer just words on a page. God was speaking. Truth began replacing the lies I had believed.
As conviction grew, so did my understanding of God’s mercy. The Lord was not exposing my sin to destroy me. He was revealing it so He could save me.
The issue was no longer simply sexuality. The deeper question was lordship.
Eventually, I reached a crossroads. The issue was no longer simply sexuality. The deeper question was lordship. Would I trust Jesus? Would I trust that His design was better than my own? Would I surrender my identity, plans, relationships, and future to Him? By God’s grace, I did.
Repentance was painful. Obedience required sacrifice. But what I discovered on the other side was not loss—it was freedom.
Over time, God renewed my mind through His Word, healed many of the wounds that had shaped my life, and taught me that my true identity is not found in my past, my temptations, or my feelings. My identity is found in Jesus Christ.
Today, I have the privilege of sharing that message with others. Through writing, speaking, and ministry, I encourage people who are wrestling with sexual brokenness, identity confusion, shame, and hopelessness. My testimony is not ultimately about leaving a former lifestyle. It is about encountering a Savior who transforms lives.
If there is one truth I hope readers take away from my story, it is this: no one is beyond the reach of God’s grace. The same Jesus who pursued me is still pursuing people today. He still calls sinners to repentance. He still heals wounded hearts. He still makes all things new.
I know because He did it for me.
About the Author
Mark Richard is an author, speaker, and follower of Jesus Christ whose life was transformed by the truth and grace of God. After spending nearly three decades in a same-sex relationship, he encountered the living Christ through Scripture and surrendered his life fully to Him. Today, he encourages and equips individuals, families, and churches with the truth of the Gospel and the power of God’s transforming grace.
He is the author of Sacred Sexuality: Grace and Truth Revealed in a Culture of Confusion. Mark lives in Toledo, Ohio, near his daughter and granddaughter. You can find more information on his website: www.MarkRichardMinistry.com
My life has been full of divine appointments. Lately it seems like every week God sets me up with a life-changing conversation. I’ve learned that when we’re willing and available, God is always at work. Sometimes He asks us to do something that doesn’t make sense at the time, but later we realize He was arranging something far bigger than we could see.
One day I was preparing a meal for a team that was visiting us. I kept hearing that I needed to prepare salsa. I argued with myself, saying, “I don’t have anything for salsa. I would need to go to the store.” But I couldn’t shake it, so I went.
At the store I ran into a woman who was also picking out Roma tomatoes. “Are you making salsa?” she asked me. When I said yes, she asked if I had a recipe and who I was making it for.
I told her I was making it for a team because I am a missionary. Immediately, she started to cry. I asked if she had someplace to go and invited her to come back to my house with me. She said yes.
Sometimes He asks us to do something that doesn’t make sense at the time, but later we realize He was arranging something far bigger than we could see.
As we talked at my home, she began sharing details about her life, and I began sharing parts of my own story that I don’t normally tell people. It quickly became clear that those experiences spoke directly to what she was going through. They were exactly what she needed to hear that day.
Finally, she confessed, “I told God if He was real, to send me someone who believed in Him, or I would kill myself.”
You know what’s funny? I never made the salsa. It was never about the salsa.
I’ve learned not to lean on my own understanding. When God nudges us to do something, we often want to know why before we obey. But sometimes we don’t see His purpose until afterward. If I had waited until it made sense, I would have missed that divine appointment completely.
That seems to be happening a lot lately.
The day before I flew to visit my daughter in Springfield, Oregon, I had to get new tires for my car. After striking out at three different tire stores, I finally ended up at Pep Boys near the border. There was only one other person waiting.
He began telling me he had recently been diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer. He said it was so hard to get in to see the doctor because of the waiting lists. Then he quietly said, “I guess I’ll just die.”
I asked him, “Where will you go when you die?”
He got very quiet. I asked if he believed in God, and it opened the door for us to talk. I could tell he didn’t really know the Lord. I don’t know whether he accepted Christ that day, but I know I had the opportunity to share with him. Maybe someone else will water that seed. I believe that was another divine appointment.
You know what’s funny? I never made the salsa. It was never about the salsa.
The very next day I boarded my flight to Oregon. The woman in the window seat beside me was a Christian. Right away, we started talking about the Lord and prayer. She was a real prayer warrior. I was in the middle seat, and a man sat beside me on the aisle.
About an hour into the flight, the woman sitting directly in front of us suddenly stopped breathing. The man beside her realized something was wrong, alerted her husband, and soon a doctor on the plane pulled her into the aisle and began CPR.
The woman beside me and I immediately began praying and speaking life over her. Thankfully, she came back.
A little while later the man sitting next to me tapped me on the shoulder and said, “I heard what you said.”
I asked, “What did I say?” (We had been talking about the Lord for the whole flight.)
He replied, “You said, ‘Life is short.'”
“It is,” I said. “And where you go when you die is so important.” That opened the door for me to share Jesus with him.
Looking back, I can’t help but marvel. God placed a prayer warrior beside me, seated the woman who needed prayer directly in front of us, and had a doctor on board. At the same time, He gave me an opportunity to talk with the man beside me about eternity. God arranged every seat on that plane for His purposes.
When I got off the plane, my daughter Sherry asked, “Mom, what’s your story today?”
I said, “Oh, Sherry, you’re not going to believe it.”
There have been so many moments like that over the years.
Once, while my husband and I were itinerating, I sat next to a woman on a plane who told me she was traveling the world because she only had three months to live.
God is already at work in people’s lives;
He simply invites us to join Him.
I said, “Oh my goodness, you only have three months to live! You’re almost going to meet your Maker!”
When she told me she used to go to church, I asked if I could pray for her. She said no. We kept talking, and eventually she mentioned that her back was hurting terribly. This was completely out of character for me, but I asked if I could rub her back. She leaned forward and said yes.
As I began rubbing her back, I felt the Holy Spirit come over me, and I started singing, “Be still and know that I am God.” When I finished, she quietly asked, “Would you pray for me?” This time she was ready.
I prayed with her and had the privilege of leading her to the Lord that day. When I got off the plane, my husband, who had been sitting three rows away, asked, “What was going on back there? I heard you singing.” I would never have done something like that on my own. It was definitely the Holy Spirit.
I’m becoming convinced that divine appointments really are everywhere. They happen on airplanes, in restaurants, at tire stores, in grocery stores, and wherever else God leads us.
Our part is simply to be available.
Not every conversation ends the way we wish it would. Sometimes we have the privilege of seeing someone place their faith in Christ, but other times, we just plant a seed. Someone else may water it later, and we trust God to bring the increase. When we are faithful to share His love, we can leave the results in His hands. God is already at work in people’s lives; He simply invites us to join Him.
About the Author
Fayth McConnell has felt God’s call on her life since childhood. She was blessed to share sixty-nine years of marriage with her husband, and together they raised one son, two daughters, and a brother. Throughout their life and ministry together, Fayth and her husband faithfully served the Lord as pastors and Open Bible missionaries to Mexico. Since 1998, they have shared the love of Christ and ministered to others throughout Mexico. Fayth continues to serve as an Open Bible missionary, carrying on the call God placed on her life many years ago.
Ruth Brauer spent decades wondering about the brother she never got to know. Born with Down Syndrome in the 1960s, he’d been sent away with little explanation, and she was discouraged from asking questions. After years of dead ends, a series of connections only God could have orchestrated led to the reunion she’d been praying for. Sixty years after his birth, Ruth finally saw her brother for the first time.
It was March 1960. Ruth was about to turn seven when her baby brother was born on March 8th at Iowa Methodist Hospital. The excitement of finally having a brother to join her and her three sisters quickly turned to confusion as she was unable to meet him. Later, she learned he had Down Syndrome and that doctors had advised her parents to place him in a care facility at the nearby Woodward State Hospital.
“Back in the sixties, that’s just what you did,” Ruth shared. “But I know it tore my parents apart.”
Questions about Alan were shut down. Ruth didn’t know where he was or even his exact birth date.
“I always wondered about him, but I’d get in trouble when I asked.”
Even without knowing him, Ruth had always felt drawn to him. That compassion shaped much of her life. After being invited to Journey Church in 2016 by a friend, Ruth was especially moved by the church’s outreach events for children with special needs. As a barber, her favorite clients were those with special needs, and she also volunteered for years with the Des Moines Special Olympics.
That’s where the first breakthrough came.
One day, she struck up a deeper conversation with a fellow volunteer named Ray. He mentioned he had worked at Woodward State Hospital starting in 1959. Ruth’s attention snapped into focus.
“My brother was there in 1960! His name was Alan Politsch.”
Ray’s reaction was immediate. His eyes widened and he began to walk away.
“Wait—what did I say?” Ruth called after him.
I had my hand on the table, and suddenly he was holding it.
“I’m not allowed to talk to you,” he replied. “Your parents banned me from talking to you.”
Still, she pressed him for one thing: a birthdate.
“Please, my parents are gone. I just want to find my brother.”
Before the day ended, Ray quietly gave her the month and day. It was enough to start, but not enough to get through the wall of privacy protections. Every group home she contacted turned her away.
Years passed.
Then another door opened—this time at a food pantry. Ruth shared her story with a volunteer named Bob, who offered to connect her with someone in the state department.
“They may not even call you,” he warned.
But they did.
The woman on the phone didn’t give her name, but simply said, “Bob said I needed to hear your story.” Ruth told her everything she knew: names, dates, places, family history. Weeks later, the phone rang again.
“Hi, this is Michelle,” the voice said. “I’m Alan’s guardian.”
Tears falling, Ruth began to speak.
“I don’t want to take anything from you. I just want to know he’s okay… maybe see a picture. And someday, maybe meet him.”
As she spoke, Ruth’s phone began to ping. Michelle was sending photos.
The call came in 2021, but it would take almost two years to build enough trust for a visit.
In August of 2023, Ruth was invited to a staff meeting at Alan’s care facility. As she sat in the room with nine other employees staring at her, Michelle walked into the room, Alan beside her, and guided him to the seat right next to Ruth.
I always felt like he was close by,” Ruth said. “I just didn’t know he was five miles away my whole life.
“He kept looking at me, nodding, with this little crooked smile,” Ruth said. “I had my hand on the table, and suddenly he was holding it.”
A nurse watching over video spoke up: “He knows you’re his sister.”
The bond was immediate and mutual.
“I always felt like he was close by,” Ruth said. “I just didn’t know he was five miles away my whole life.”
Since that day, they’ve spent birthdays and holidays together.
“He’s the best,” she said. “He fits right under my arm—he’s tiny. He loves Santa, the color red, Coke, and sunglasses.”
But the reunion has come with weight, too. Now 66, Alan’s health is declining, and Ruth has been asked to help plan his funeral.
“I just found him,” she said. “And now I’m helping plan his funeral… But he’s mine. He’s my baby brother. The one I waited for when I was seven.”
Looking back, Ruth continues to uncover the fingerprints of God. Ray, the man who first gave her Alan’s birthdate, later shared that he had cared for Alan during his first sixteen years at the hospital.
What are the odds?
When asked what this journey has taught her, Ruth doesn’t hesitate:
“Patience, persistence, prayer, and people.” That’s what it took to find her brother, and it’s what the Lord provided along the way.
Some stories don’t unfold quickly. Many of them take time, and it’s only later that we realize how God was working in our waiting. Ruth’s story serves as a reminder that no prayer is forgotten, no relationship is beyond reach, and that even in life’s chapters that feel long or uneventful, God is still writing.
About the Author
Hannah Bemis currently serves as the editor and director of Message of the Open Bible. She always wanted to do too many things when she grew up, and God has been kind enough to let her do most of them in different seasons. After seasons of mothering, teaching, writing, and staff pastoring, Hannah’s most recent adventure is planting and pastoring College Street Church in Newberg, Oregon, with her husband, Jordan. After Jesus and all her favorite people, she spends the remainder of her passion on pizza and dark chocolate in equal measure.